To my dearest friends and family,
One of the hardest things to do in a Christian’s life is to wait! I want my blessings and my breakthroughs now! Many Christians would rather make things happen themselves or just completely give up rather than to wait. This is really natural. But it’s important to remember that waiting is not the same as giving up. We are to wait expectantly and to seek and to look for His guidance to take the next step. Sometimes we don’t understand why God would let His people go through trials and struggles, but I believe with every trial, we get wiser and stronger and our faith grows as we see that God is faithful. And most importantly, God gets the glory, not you! Actually, I think as Christians, we would be pretty spoiled and prideful if we got everything we wanted when we wanted it without any effort! Matthew 5:45 says “He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” God never promised an easy, carefree life for His people.
Right now, I've come to a complete standstill with the music ministry. I had to focus on the baby (now I’m 19 weeks pregnant) and it seems that my voice has changed because of hormones and it’s not usually a good idea to spend a lot of money in the recording studio when you have a hormonally altered voice! A year ago, I thought I’d be making a full album this year. I thought huge things were going to happen in 2009! Then I got one reality check after another. The next thing I knew, I could only record four songs because that is all I could afford. Then, the whole music making process was so stressful and I was facing harder decisions than I ever imagined so I had to take a step back! Now that I've been resting, I feel like I could possibly move forward, but it isn't wise because of my voice, and I also feel that God has given me a bigger responsibility right now, which is taking care of the baby. I don’t even know when I’ll have the opportunity to pick it back up! Maybe I will after I have the baby in 2010; maybe not! But I’m trusting that God has a plan for me and He has a perfect timing! Isaiah 40:31 says: “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”
Whenever I find myself trying hard to make things happen that are just not working, I get extremely stressed out and begin to lean on my own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6), which for men, is usually doubting and using the wrong means to make things work! When I give it over to the Lord and wait on Him, He gives me a peace and a rest! Right now, I’m resting, and it has honestly been a big relief! As much as it has been disappointing that things did not happen when I wanted them to, I am so thankful for God’s rest, and trusting that when His time comes, He will let me know, and I will be running and soaring!
I hope this encourages you as you are waiting on God’s promises. Stand on God’s promises, not the devil’s lies!
P.S. Our baby is supposed to be a girl, and we are naming her Cloey or Khloe!